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How to Get Your Wedding Guests to RSVP on Time and Reduce Stress

RSVPs are arguably one of the most stressful parts of planning your wedding. RSVPs are important to gain for your venue and your suppliers, but they are also important for you to have so you can reduce your wedding planning stress.

Why are RSVPs so stressful? Because they are outside of your control.

Handmade save the dates
Save the dates

Couples' wedding stress and anxiety are down to things that rely on other people. Suppliers, guests, mothers, uninvited guests… You have to be okay with not being okay with some areas of your planning but put measures in place to increase your control.

Wedding RSVPs are required for your venue and food & drink suppliers; final numbers aren’t usually required until a month out; but an idea of numbers around 2-3 months out from your wedding day.

However, you may want them earlier for your own peace of mind, for your favours and your budget!

Here are some tips on how to get your guests to RSVP.

Tip 1: The more you care about how many people are at your wedding, the earlier you should set the RSVP date.

On a scale of 1-10, how much do you care about how many people are attending your wedding? 10 being it’s my biggest care is who is coming to the wedding and how much budget we have, and 1 being you aren’t really fussed about who is coming to your wedding.

The closer you are to 10, the further out you should set your RSVP date. See our blog on when to send your invitations to find out when is best to send these.

Tip 2: Set yourself an RSVP deadline later than the deadline you give to your guests.

We’ve already discussed how bad guests can be at responding to your wedding invitations. So set a deadline on your invitations, then set yourself a mental deadline a month after. That way you know you’re going to meet the deadline.

Tip 3: Make it easy to RSVP.

Using an online RSVP tracker will be quick and simple for your guests to complete, websites such as With Joy offer this.

Not only will it be quicker for guests, but it will make your life much easier. You won’t have to deal with RSVPs coming in the post, tracking them manually on your Excel spreadsheet. Doing it all online will mean it’s done for you, it will even track wedding guest dietary requirements and menu choices!

Tip 4: Send RSVP chasers.

It’s okay to send texts or do calls to chase guests to RSVP. Even meet them for a coffee and fill it in with them! They will likely just think you know their answer, but tell them that it matters to you that they fill this in.

Tip 5: Get tough (or jokey) with the invited wedding guests.

If you’ve got the confidence, make a ‘joke’ and tell them they will be missed off the list if they don’t respond as it’s how you’re tracking the people coming with the venue.

Tip 6: Be prepared for guests saying no.

It is a confusing and often upsetting response to get a ‘no’ from someone you wanted to be at your wedding. Be prepared for this. The Wedding Hand coaching and support services can support you with this. Refer to this blog to get a free coaching session on guests!

Getting your guests to RSVP to your wedding is stressful and out of your control, but you have the power in your hands to get what you need. Your wedding stress remaining low and wedding planing love remaining high are the most important thing!

Best of luck with your RSVP’ing!

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